One of the natural yet somewhat discouraging effects of most kinds of growth we, humans, experience is the “two steps forward, one step back” effect. Almost any kind of growth is associated with inevitable temporary setbacks and decline before further development takes place. Perhaps this is one of the reasons that new year’s resolutions don’t work all that well. People who make a certain promise to themselves become discouraged and give up as soon as they hit a plateau in whatever progress they are seeking. The most common example of it is a diet/exercise resolution. A person who is eager to lose weight is likely to quit his plan altogether as soon as he violates the self imposed rules of a very strict diet and a daily exercise. Breaking one little rule makes a person want to quit the whole program altogether and start all over sometime later.
Becoming more confident with women is not very different in that regard. It is essential to keep in mind that any work you do to become more confident and more attractive is necessarily going to be associated with temporary setbacks, especially when you try to put your confidence to actual “field” practice. No matter how much you learn about confidence and how much good work you do to become more confident with women, there will be days and weeks when you will feel socially awkward and unable to hold a conversation the way you would on your good. But this should not worry you, as it’s a completely natural part of any significant growth, and you should not expect be confident with women all the time.
Think about all the great athletes. What makes them so great besides achieving superior results is their ability to handle those moments when they are not at their best. They know these moments are coming and coming regularly, and they make sure to be ready for them. Take, for example, today’s number one tennis player – Rafael Nadal. What makes him a great champion except his great game? It’s his spirit – it’s his ability to stay strong and positive no matter where he is in the match, and his ability to lose with grace.
Your ability to remain focused during those days when you are just not “on” and wait till that time passes and you get back into your comfort zone is a very important part of being a truly confident man. There will be days in your life when you will be remarkably creative and eloquent when you come up to women or talk to them online or on your dates. But then there will be other days when you will feel less uncomfortable, at a loss of words or just not into it for no apparent reason at all. All this is normal, and it’s part of the overall ups and downs in your levels of energy and behavior.
And of course, you should not forget to read the article on how to become more confident with women.
